Correspondence
by fabulouslycrushed
Summary: After Edward left Bella 2 years ago, she finally handles life better. And begins writing a chain of letters to Alice, but what she never expected was Alice to reply!
1. Addressed

_Edward,_

_I wonder why I'm writing this to you._

_I doubt you'd understand, truly, but I can't stop thinking about you- and me- and what we had. I can't get you out of my head._

_I know I miss you- but you seem to be so wound up in your little 'Keep Bella safe' games to ever think twice about coming back._

_I told myself I wouldn't beg, I don't think I could stand it._

_Besides, we both know what your answer would be._

_And I just wanted to say…_

Ugh! I sounded so stupid and needy. I balled up the paper, throwing it- and missing, I might add (curse my lack of athletic ability!)- towards the trash can.

I sighed. Then got up, unfolded the now crumpled paper and laid it out flat.

I didn't know why, but I'd begun a habit of keeping all the rubbish letters to Edward- and sometimes the other Cullens- I'd never send.

I wasn't over him- not now, maybe never- but I was better. And although the hole in my chest was still there, it didn't rip me open like it used to, didn't send me buckled over or holding my chest together anymore. Needless to say, it still hurt, worried me like a constant headache- a dull pain that never left.

I carefully put the half-written letter in a box under my bed along with everything else I never wanted to remember…

Under my bed was everything from them, the Cullens. And that stereo they'd given me 2 years back? In the dump somewhere, most-like. Mauled beyond recognition.

I had already finished my homework- what normally happened wit the result of no friends. But who needed them, anyway? I know they wanted to help- at first- but what could I say? 'Oh, I fell in love with a vampire but couldn't hold his attention, so he left?' Most definitely not! I'd be in a padded room before even I knew it.

So I took out yet another piece of paper, and tried starting a letter to Alice. Maybe she'd be easier to write to…

_Alice,_

_Hi. It's Bella._

'Hi. It's Bella.' God, I was such a loser. No wonder Edward left me… but I couldn't think like that.

I scratched out my attempt and tried again.

_Alice,_

_You remember me?_

As if she could forget the girl who destroyed her family, always putting them in danger, wouldn't go shopping with her and couldn't walk over a flat surface without tripping. But, oh well. I was keeping this.

_Well, how could you forget?_

_Don't tell Edward I wrote this to you- I wouldn't want him to have to worry or anything. He should be out having fun with his distractions._

God! Why was I so bitter? If this was going to hurt, then I really shouldn't write it…

_I'm sorry. That was bitter._

_I missed you. How are you holding up?_

Better than you are, Bella, I'm sure. I thought, suddenly furious. Her life was good, and if it wasn't, she had all the time in the world to make it that way.

_I was really beginning to wonder if writing this letter was such a good idea in the first place._

_Any good malls where you are? If there are, I'm sure you have all the latest designer clothes gone by now._

_I'm sure my fashion is just as bad as before- but, girl, you've always exceeded me there!_

Everywhere, really. But I refuse to say that. And this letter appears bipolar. From pissed and grieving to strangely cheerful about… well, the last thing I should be cheerful about, fashion. What was wrong with me?

_I doubt you'll get this- or read it._

_But if you feel up to it, write me back._

_(No matter what Edward may say!)_

_We all know whose the sneakiest vampire in your family, Alice._

_Just think carefully always._

_I love you._

_And, if you can, give my regards to everyone (yes, even Rosalie!);_

_Bella_

Oh, god! I didn't realize I was crying. Not dead out sobbing, just watering up a bit. Man, I was super-sensitive when it came to them.

I folded up the letter, internally debating if I should send it. Or if it'd get through- seeing as how I didn't have their new address. Or even if they'd read it. Well, Alice would probably 'see' me sending it- so at least she'd be prepared…

Then I realized. Alice had never got to say 'good-bye' to me. I mean, of course I'd noticed at the time, but it didn't click with me… she might not have agreed with Edward, after all, we'd been friends, hadn't we?

Alice had 'borrowed' one of my prettier blouses a week before they- well, he- left, claiming she liked it but was going to 'update' it.

But when I'd gotten it back the very day the Cullens left, it was the same. Apparently Alice had 'never gotten around to it' and, at the time, I was extremely hurt by it. I had been on the bottom of their priorities list even then!

I hadn't even washed the shirt since then, it was still hanging in my closet.

I opened up the door and pulled the blouse down searching it. I couldn't find anything and threw it on the bed.

The tears were threatening now, and I let them come. But through my blurry eyes I saw a corner of a folded piece of paper.

I got up, and inside the blouse, safety-pinned onto the inside, was a note.

Addressed to me.


	2. Mailed

I lightly unhooked the note, and opened it up.

"Bella", it read;

_He would kill me for giving this to you._

_But I don't care. Bella, I'm truly sorry._

_If you can forgive me and feel like talking…_

Below was an address in Alaska. It was signed, "Alice". I stood trembling, not knowing if this was really happening.

I folded up the paper and placed it on my messy desk, then opened up a drawer and pulled out an envelope.

I addressed it 'Alice Cullen' and, with my pathetic letter inside, sealed the envelope. I made sure the address on the envelope was the same as the one given on the note (again). After all, the on the note was my last connection to them; to _him._

I left the envelope on the desk, along with the other mail I needed to send; my cell phone bill- which I insisted I pay myself- a letter to Renee (my mother) as my computer finally rolled over and died last week. And the computer personnel guy wasn't supposed to be here until Friday or so, and today was Monday…

It was getting later. I took a shower, combed my hair, brushed my teeth and climber into bed. And, for once, I didn't dream. It was just a deep, sound sleep.

I woke up early the next day and got all ready for work. Charlie was already gone, off to work early, I presumed. I hopped into my old Red Chevy and, with a roar, it started to life. I loved this old truck. I drove to my job at Newton's- it was only part-time, yet it filled my days well.

I should've been in college, no doubt, but I just couldn't leave Forks- always hoping (if subconsciously) _they'd _return. I couldn't deny why I stayed. And now I was more positive I had to than ever.

"Hey, Bella." Mike greeted me on my way in.

"Hi, Mike." I replied.

My shift passed slowly. But, finally, it was time to head home.

"Hey, Mike, I'm heading out for today. See you tomorrow?" I asked, already knowing he would be here. I wondered vaguely if I should ask him for Jessica's number, to see what she thought of this whole mailing the Cullens business, but deciding against it.

"Oh. Yeah, g'bye Bella!" he called to me cheerfully as I walked out the door.

I walked slowly out to my truck, thinking. Now that I was thinking about _them-_with the hole in my chest throbbing slightly- I was unsure once more about actually sending the letter…

First off, I had sounded so whiny, stupid and needy in that letter; like I couldn't form coherent thoughts without them, which, at times, I couldn't. Second, I didn't want Edward to get mad with Alice- and although I knew Alice could obviously hold her own- I still felt bad causing _more _problems in her family. Not to mention the fact that I didn't know if I was ready to talk to the Cullens, reopen all the old wounds…

I had decided not to send the letter, at least not just yet, and climbed into the truck. I pulled onto my driveway just a little bit later and got out. I looked at the sky, it looked about to rain- oh, why was I constantly surprised?

I took off my coat once in the doorway, laying it on the coat rack- and ran up into my bedroom. I lay down on the bed staring blankly at the ceiling. Unbidden, memories of Edward and me –together- came back. I wiped the back of my hand over my eyes, I had to stop Charlie would be home soon… _Charlie. _With that I got up and went down to make dinner.

"Bella?" he called, hanging up his gun.

"Hey Dad! In the kitchen!" I replied, pausing in my chopping of some tomatoes for a salad. Although I probably _could _talk and cut tomatoes at the same time- why chance it? I laughed at myself and missed most of what Charlie had said,

"…game I want to watch- call me when dinner's ready, Bells." And with that, he was gone.

A memory flashed again and I instantly dropped the knife I was holding…

_"Wait!" I choked on the word, reaching for him._

_"Take care of yourself." He breathed, cool against my skin._

_There was a light, unnatural breeze. My eyes flashed open. The leaves on a small vine maple shuddered with the gentle wind of his passage._

_He was gone._

The knife clattered to the floor, narrowly missing my foot, and I blinked, still dazed. I reached down for it with one hand, the other holding my chest together… _Edward._

I was _so _not ready for this. I couldn't talk to them, not yet, definitely. I had to go tear up that letter before Charlie takes our mail Tuesday…

_Tuesday. _Dang! Today was Tuesday! But had he checked my desk for the mail? Normally I left it on the kitchen table for him to take. But maybe he wouldn't have delivered a letter to the _Cullens _anyway. After all, he _had _been there the first few months after _they _left… Surely he wouldn't have mailed a letter to Edward? Oh, wait. Hat letter was addressed to Alice. And Charlie always had liked Alice. Uh-oh.

I ran upstairs, unmindful of whatever it was cooking in the oven downstairs. I jumped unto my bed, scrambling over it to my desk on the other side. It was still messy, but lacking the 3 pieces of unsent mail.

Now, normally, I would've been happy for Charlie willing to help me out, but not this time.

I sat on my bed, hyperventilating until the timer on the oven went off. Startled, I flew off the bed looking around my room warily. The oven continued to beep.

"Bella?" Charlie called, concerned, from the living room.

"Don't worry, I got it, Dad, I was just upstairs for a sec." I reassured him, running down the steps and turning off the timer.

I removed dinner and set out 2 plates- mine and his.

"Dad," I called, "dinner." With a grunt, the TV was turned off and Charlie shuffled into the kitchen.

"Smells good, Bells." Charlie assured me, grinning.

"Hey, Dad?" I paused.

"Yeah?" he looked up from his dinner across at me.

"Did you… um…" I looked down at my plate, "did you mail a bill and some letters for me today?"

"Yes. Was I not supposed to? 'Cause I mean, they were all addressed and stuff…" he trailed off, blushing.

Now it was my turn to feel embarrassed. Here Charlie was looking out for me and I was picking at him for it.

"No. Thank you for helping me out… I just wanted to make sure they didn't just disappear…" I finished lamely.

I was sure if he mailed them, he'd ask me something. And Alice would be getting the letter in about a week…

"Bella?" I looked up, jolted out of my thoughts.

"Yes?" I could guess what he was going to say.

He raised one eyebrow and looked at me quizzically,

"Alice Cullen?"


	3. Late

**Author's Note: To all my readers… I am terribly, horribly, dead sorry that this update is soooo late. I was really busy- I had to organize my school's carnations selling and passing them out. On top of that, I had all the homework and classwork I missed while dealing with the flowers to complete. Again, my apologies. Please let me know what you think about this chapter- and I will try to update sooner!**

**"**_Alice Cullen?"_

A week had passed since my interrogation from Charlie. At first, he hadn't believed me at all that the letter really was to Alice, and not a scheme to bring Edward back…. Which, I hadn't thought of and was now thinking about…

I missed Edward, it was true, but I had enough of everything else to truly worry about. And although he was always in the back of my mind… I was gradually learning to think of him less. Not to avoid thinking of him at all, but less than my usual- which was all day, wondering what I could've done to keep him.

Charlie began to not watch me as much as usual, and I felt okay. Not happy, or perfect, but fine. Like I might've been if I'd never met Edward- except those fleeting moments where something someone would say would just transport me back to those last few moments…

_"I don't want you to come with me, Bella."_

_"You… don't… want… me?" The words sounded strange putting them together in that order._

_"No."_

And then the agony was immense.

I was beginning to wonder if Alice had never gotten my letter. Or, rather, chosen not to reply. Not that I thought she would do that… but if Edward made sure she _didn't _reply…

I went upstairs to work on my college applications. Charlie wanted me to apply, now that it seemed I was in one piece again. But I really wasn't into the whole move away thing. After all, how would Alice know where to send the letters- which she may never even write?

Wait, it was _Alice _we're talking about. The future predictor, and the mad shopaholic. Of course if I thought enough about my decision to go to a college and which dorm to choose, she'd see it.

None of the few colleges whose forms I'd already filled out and mailed in had replied yet. And I'd begun to think my mail was cut off from everyone else's.

An hour passed, and then, another. It was odd Charlie wasn't home yet.

But I'd better make him dinner anyway.

I went, mumbling to myself about how many times I'd had to write my name today all they way, down the steps. I put something in the oven, truly forgetting what it was.

The oven beeped, but I didn't really notice it.

I was getting a bad feeling…

I didn't know why, but it was bugging me. Like when someone nagged at you or insulted you and you felt the worry deep-down, wondering if that was how you _really _were or not.

Like when you have to take a big math test and you just _know _you totally bombed it because you blew off studying the night before.

Or when you do something… not so good, like cutting school, and you know you're going to get grounded for it.

But the feeling wasn't guilt. And it wasn't anticipation.

Was it… anxiety?

Was I… nervous?

Why?

I looked out the window, it was getting dark. And Charlie _really _should've been home by now.

I looked at the phone, willing it to ring, with Charlie on the other end, saying he'd be later.

The phone remained silent.

_Hmm…_

I tried to remember Charlie's plans for the evening- was he over with Billy? I didn't think so. We'd been there last night.

I turned off the oven, taking out the dinner that was going to get cold.

The phone rang, and I turned so quickly whatever I had been cooking, some of it spilled on my jeans.

"Ahhh! Shit!"

It was _hot. _Really, really hot. Like, burning my leg.

"Ahh!" Okay, I wiped it off, and got a rag on my leg.

The answering machine picked up then, and I heard the caller start to leave a message;

_"Hello, this is Forks hospital. We are calling to tell you Charlie Swan has been in an accident…"_


End file.
